Tantalizing Tomato Taste? NOT!

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Music – “Attack of the Killer Tomatoes”. Released: 2009.

Green tomatoes before and after being sent to the gas chamber! (Photo Credit: http://www.newserv.com)

Once upon a time, tomatoes tasted good…..really good.  Now, unless you lovingly plant them in your backyard yourself and nurture them to fruition with care, the tomatoes you purchase in your local supermarket will have about as much taste and texture as a wad of cotton balls in your mouth.  You know…what you taste and choke on, when you’re sitting, helpless in the dentist’s chair.  Yecch!

 

 

One of my recent acquisitions was “The Good Cook’s Book of Tomatoes“, by Michele Anna Jordan, published in 1995, but updated in 2015.

“The Good Cook’s Book of Tomatoes” by Michele Anna Jordan.

Talking about tomatoes, the author notes that “Nearly every supermarket in the country features mounds of these pale, mushy tomatoes whose taste bears not even a shadowy resemblance to what we seek”.  She goes on to ask, “How did this happen?”

 

This is typical of the “supermarket” tomato. A bare touch of red color, pasty in texture and with virtually no taste. (Photo Credit: http://www.sciencemag.org)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

More tasteless tomatoes wrapped in plastic (Photo Credit: http://www.veggies-only.blogspot.com)

Barry Estabrook, in his book, “Tomatoland“, talks about the commercial production of “supermarket” tomatoes.  As most of us already know, ethylene gas is sprayed on unripe green tomatoes, which causes them to turn red.

As the author notes:  “Ethylene is a gaseous plant hormone that regulates plant growth. When applied to fruits, it initiates the ripening process and causes the fruit to turn red. The chemical also affects the flavor by increasing sugar compounds and decreasing acidity within the fruit. This chemical is emitted naturally by plants in fields, but only when the plants naturally want to ripen”  The key here is “…only when the plants naturally want to ripen”.

More “supermarket” tomatoes. Mandatory Credit: Photo by Global Warming Images/REX/Shutterstock (2005361a)(www.thedailymash.co.uk)

Green, unripe tomatoes awaiting their turn in the gas chamber. (Photo Credit: http://www.frontlineservices.com.au)

 

The problem is that although the tomatoes turn a pleasant red color (sometimes), after being sprayed with ethylene, the fruit does not actually ripen.  Estabrook also points out that exposing immature fruit to the ethylene results in fruit with “poor eating quality“. No kidding!

 

Some of my regular readers might remember my post, “The Terrible Tale of the Tomato Tragedy” (May 6, 2016) in which I recanted the horror of losing almost all of my carefully planted tomato seeds in a portable greenhouse, indoors.  For weeks, watering, fertilizing, thinning, moving them for optimum sun, etc. until the fateful day came to put them outside to begin “hardening off”.

Alas, in the wee hours of the morning, without any warning, the formidable, but unpredictable canyon winds came roaring through our property, relentless and endless.  The sound of the crash of the toppled greenhouse outside my bedroom window at 3:00 am was my first clue that my precious seedlings were in trouble.  Of more than a hundred seedlings, I managed to save about 20.  Heartbreaking.

This year, I have ordered transplants for my garden.  The variety of tomatoes available is astounding!  Much research has been conducted over the years to not only bring back that luscious tomato flavor we all crave, but also to breed them to be disease and pest resistant.  A tough call, but great strides have been made.

From  Territorial Seed Company out of Cottage Grove, Oregon, I ordered 4 transplants, primarily for containers, which I have in my courtyard.  I have ordered from them previously, with good results.  In a few months I’ll be receiving the likes of “Lizzano Transplant Tomato“, “Ruby Crush Transplant Tomato“, “Red Racer Transplant Tomato“, and “Artemis Transplant Tomato“.

Lizzano Transplant Tomato (Photo Credit: http://www.territorialseed.com)

Ruby Crush Transplant Tomato (Photo Credit: http://www.terrritorialseed.com)

 

 

 

 

Red Racer Transplant Tomato (Photo Credit: http://www.territorialseed.com)

Artemis Transplant Tomato (Photo Credit: http://www.territorialseed.com)

 

I can hardly wait!  You can order directly from them online for immediate and delayed (according to your climate zone) purchases:  http://www.territorialseed.com.

 

 

 

Also this year, I ordered some additional transplants from a company I was unfamiliar with until I received their catalogue:  Gurney’s Seed & Nursery Company, located in Greendale, Indiana.  From their collection I will be receiving “Early Girl Tomato“, “Iron Lady Tomato” (I wonder if this is named after Margaret Thatcher?!), “Celebration Tomato“, “Gurney’s Ruby Monster Tomato” (I just love it when the word “monster” is used to describe vegetables!) and “Sweet Million Hybrid Tomato“.

Early Girl Tomato (Photo Credit: http://www.gurneys.com)

Iron Lady Tomato (Photo Credit: http://www.gurneys.com)

Celebration Tomato (Photo Credit: http://www.gurneys.com)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Gurney’s Ruby Monster Tomato (Photo Credit: http://www.gurneys.com)

 

 

They also have online purchasing for all of their products, including seeds, transplants and much more:  http://www.gurneys.com.

Sweet Million Hybrid Tomato (Photo Credit: http://www.gurneys.com)

 

 

So, here’s to the re-birth of the good ol’ tomato of our bygone childhoods.  Long live tomatoes with flavor!

Pop and Puff: Tomorrow is National Popcorn Day!

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Music – “The Popcorn Song” from Fun Songs for Happy Kids – Favorite Lullabies, Rhymes, Stories & More by The Fontane Sisters & Howdy Doody. Released: 2012.

Well,  here we are.  Saturday, January 19th, 2019 is NATIONAL POPCORN DAY!  What are YOU doing to celebrate this annual event?  It comes but once a year, so be prepared.

W.C. Fields once said, “The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves“.  Now, that’s lazy!  There is an unproven theory that an Indian named Quadequina brought a deerskin bag of popped corn for the first Thanksgiving feast on October 15, 1621. In 1948 and 1950, anthropologist Herbert Dick and botanist Earle Smith discovered ears of popcorn in the Bat Cave of west-central New Mexico.  So the story goes.

Bat Cave, located in west-central New Mexico (Photo Credit: National Conference of State Historic Preservation Officers)

Americans eat a lot of popcorn per year and there are hundreds of flavours out there.  I remember going to the movies as a kid and getting a small cardboard container with some slippery yellow fluid drizzled over the popcorn.  I’m not certain what it was, but it was probably not butter!  So, tomorrow, get out your popcorn poppers or Jiffy Pop bags (do they still make those?) and pop away!

Harry Kalenberg creates his own version of “pop” art, using magic markers! (Photo Credit: starlocalmedia.com)

Great idea! (Photo Credit: http://www.pinterest.com)

Art is in the eye of the beholder (Sculpture by Aden Hynes) (Photo Credit: http://www.sculpturestudios.co.uk)

I would discourage anyone from eating this kind of popcorn (and the Tide pods!) (Photo Credit: http://www.pinterest.com)

(Photo Credit: http://www.pinterest.com)

So, what faces do you see in YOUR popcorn? (Photo Credit: http://www.pinterest.com)

Clearly, I am NOT doing my part in popcorn consumption! (Photo Credit: http://www.popcorn.org)

“It’s a tad dry. Can I have some soda to wash it down?” (Photo Credit: http://www.pinterest.com)

This fellow takes his popcorn eating seriously! (Photo Credit: http://www.pinterest.co.uk)

Largest popcorn ball (Indiana State Fair) (Photo Credit: http://www.empirepopcorn.co.uk)

Photo of one of the stores of “Popcorn World” (Photo Credit: http://www.yelp.com)

According to their website, “Popcorn World” carries a HUGE variety of popcorn flavours:  Caramel Almond, Caramel Cashew, Caramel Extra Butter, Caramel Peanut, Caramel Pecan, Caramel Sea-Salt, Cheese & Caramel Mix, Cheese Coated Caramel, Cinnamon Toast Crunch, Kettle Corn, Movie Theater Butter, Bacon & Cheddar, BBQ, BBQ Bacon, BBQ Pizza, Bold Chipotle, Cheese, Cheese & Caramel Mix, Cheese Coated Caramel, Crab Legs,Dill Pickle, Dirty Dill Pickle, Gumbo, Hawaiian Pizza, Hot Cheddar, Hot White Cheddar, Hot Wings, Hot Wings W/ Blue Cheese, Hot Wings W/ Ranch, Jalapeno Spinach, Loaded Baked Potato, Mesquite BBQ, Parmesan & Garlic, Pizza, Roasted Garlic & Herb, Salt & Vinegar, Sea-Salt & Cracked Pepper, Southwest Jalapeno, Spicy Dill, Sriracha & Garlic, White Cheddar, Banana Nut Bread, Banana Pudding, Birthday Cake, Blackberry Cream Cheese Cobbler, Blueberry Cheesecake, Blueberry Muffin, Butterfinger, CAP’N Crunch,Cherry Cheesecake, Coconut Cream Pie, Cookies & Cream, Dark Chocolate, Dark Chocolate, Coconut Almond, Dark Chocolate Peppermint, Dark Chocolate Pomegranate, Dark Chocolate Pretzel, Egg Nog Spiked, Ginger Bread, Key-Lime Pie, Lemon Meringue Pie, M&M’s Peanut, M&M’s Plain, Milk Chocolate Bavarian Cream, Milk Chocolate Coconut Almond, Mint Chocolate Chip, Mint Chocolate Oreo, Orange Dreamsicle, Oreo Cheesecake, Oreo Cherry Cheesecake, Oreo Strawberry Cheesecake, PB&J Grape, PB&J Strawberry, Peanut Butter Banana, Peanut Butter Chocolate, Pineapple Upside Down Cheesecake, Rice Krispies Treats, Root Beer Float, Snickers, Strawberry Cheesecake, Twix, Wedding Cake, White Chocolate, White Chocolate Bavarian Cream, White Chocolate Drizzle, White Chocolate Peppermint, White Chocolate Pretzel, Blue Raspberry, Bubble Gum, Cotton Candy, Pineapple, Rainbow Mix, Strawberry Lemonade, Watermelon, and that’s not the entire list!

These are the states producing the majority of popcorn (Photo Credit: http://www.popcorn.org)

Here’s one way to enjoy popcorn! (Photo Credit: http://www.pinterest.com)

So, tomorrow, get up and get popping!

 

Christmas in New Mexico and the “River of Lights”

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Music – “Christmas in New Mexico” from Christmas in New Mexico by Jerry Dean. Released: 2013

(This is a partial re-post from 2013 with some great additions!)

Christmas in New Mexico

December, 1994 was my first Christmas in my new home in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Although our neighbourhood and surrounding neighbourhoods had the usual strings of Christmas lights, Santa Clauses and snowmen cutouts and the like, I was surprised to find that many residential areas, businesses, city buildings, hotels, etc., put out thousands of “luminarias” on Christmas Eve. There were so many of them, especially in neighbourhoods around what is called Old Town, the city started running Luminaria Tours.

Christmas Lights in Canada

Luminarias in Old Town, Albuquerque, New Mexico, Christmas Eve

More Luminarias

In 2004, my husband and I took my Mom, who had moved here in 2003, on one of the tours and it was incredible. As far as the eye could see, thousands of luminarias lining sidewalks, on rooftops and parapets, in parks and plazas, around and on top of churches: they were everywhere. It was pretty awesome and looked like a fairyland. Christmas in New Mexico is a candle sellers dream!

Some people refer to them as ‘farolitos’ (little lanterns), but they are one in the same. In northern New Mexico, the farolito is the bag with the candle inside, but in the southern part of the state, the same thing is called a luminaria.

True luminarias are a New Mexico tradition and are small (sandwich size) paper bags, filled with a couple of inches of sand. The top of the bag is folded over a bit for stability and a single white votive candle is placed inside. When lit, the golden glow lights up the dark night in a quiet and peaceful way. That first year, I wanted luminarias for our yard, to experience the tradition.

Filling the Lumarias with sand and a votive candle. Thousands are sold around Christmas

Early in November, you could drive around Albuquerque and see signs posted for purchasing luminarias by the dozen (filled and candle included), from church groups, charitable organizations, youth groups and just about everyone else.

I purchased 6 dozen of them, which were delivered the week before Christmas. On Christmas Eve, 1994, my husband and I placed them around our yard, lining the sidewalk and garden and patiently lit them, one by one. Fortunately, it was not windy, which can sometimes be a problem. How the candles never end up torching the bags and setting the yard on fire is still anathema to me, but it’s been going on for a long time and you never read of a luminaria fire from the Christmas Eve tradition.

The Spanish, Mexican and Native American traditions are strong in New Mexico, and Christmas is a time of feasting. Posole is a Southwest tradition at this time. Posole is dried hominy and it may be made as a dish in itself, but is more often featured with boned pork, onions, chiles and spices.

Posole, a traditional Christmas tradition in New Mexico, made with dried hominy

Other popular holiday dishes include Pumpkin and Chile Soup, Carne Adobada (pork chops marinated in red chile sauce), Red Chile Tamales and Albondigas Soup (a type of meatball soup with red chile).

Red Chile Tamales

Albondigas, meatball soup

Carne Adobada

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Biscochitos (the traditional spelling is Bizcochitos) (New Mexican sugar cookies) are also a Christmas specialty in New Mexico.

Bizcochitos or Biscochitos, New Mexican Sugar Cookiesark

The “River of Lights” in Albuquerque – Another Holiday Tradition!

One of the most incredible holiday events in Albuquerque began in 1996 and is sponsored by the New Mexico Biopark Society in partnership with the City of Albuquerque.  The “River of Lights” is an incredible, sprawling, impressive display of lights at the Albuquerque Biopark Botanic Garden.  There are 550 sculptures, with 12 miles of extension cords and 200 miles of light strings containing millions of individual twinkling lights of all colours.  The displays and animated sculptures range from a 1-foot flower to a 30-foot high Brontosaurus!  Although it is hard to get a sense of the scale of this installation, the tractors, cows, cacti and many more are life-size, not to mention the Brontosaurus!

My husband I and toured this amazing display on December 12th and were awed by this spectacular work of art.  Of course, it wouldn’t be New Mexico without a UFO, and there is a fabulous UFO hovering above the grounds, abducting a cow!   USA Today has sponsored a “Best Botanical Garden Holiday Lights” (Reader’s Choice) contest and the “River of Lights” is among the top 10 nominees. Enjoy the following slide show!

Author’s Note:  The Biopark “River of Lights” placed No. 8 on USA Today’s list, but as far as I’m concerned it should have been No. 1!

(all photos in the slide show by Sue Jimenez, 2018)

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Enjoy whatever holiday you celebrate at this time of year. Merry Christmas from New Mexico! Navidad Alegre y Felices Fiestas de Nuevo México!

The Gourmand’s Twelve Days of Christmas (revisited!)

Hamba kakuhle, Mr. Mandela (“Goodbye, go well” in Mr. Mandela’s first language, isiXhosa

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Music – “We Salute You Nelson Mandela” from Global Legends by Bappi Lahiri. Released: 2013

This is a re-post from December 6th, 2013 and I publish it again today to honour Mr. Mandela, who left us on December 5th, 2013.  A huge loss.

In light of the death of Nelson Mandela yesterday, I thought it might be appropriate to talk about the cookbook, “Ukutya Kwasekhaya” (home food),”Tastes from Nelson Mandela’s Kitchen”, written by Mr. Mandela’s personal chef for many years, Xoliswa Ndoyiya. Ms. Ndoyiya not only cooked for the Mandela family, but cared for his grandchildren as well and became a beloved member of their family. Ms. Ndoyiya began working for the Mandelas shortly after Mr. Mandela was released from prison in February, 1990.

“Ukutya Kwasekhaya” (home food) – “Tastes from Nelson Mandela’s Kitchen, by Xoliswa Ndoyiya

The recipes are the favourites of members of the Mandela family and the author notes that, “Although he’s the most famous man in the world, Madiba’s tastes are simple and he is happiest with traditional South African food”. Nelson Mandela was born Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela, although throughout her book, Ms. Ndoyiya refers to him as “Madiba”, which was his clan name and also a nickname for him.

Nelson Mandela with the family’s chef and author of “Ukutya Kwasekhaya”, Xoliswa Ndoyiya.

Recipes in the cookbook are diverse: Potato Bread, Isophu (sugar bean and white maize soup), Peri-Peri Chicken, Late-Start Starter fish, Peanut Butter and Spinach Soup, Umxhaxha (corn and pumpkin), Citrus Pudding, and many more intriguing dishes. The cookbook is well worth having on one’s cookbook shelf and the Nelson Mandela Foundation facilitated its publication in 2011.

Hamba kakuhle, Mr. Mandela.

 

More Talk about Cookbooks (What else?!)

Well, give me an opening and I’ll walk right in.  I was recently contacted by Assistant Producer, Andrew Ceco, of the radio talk show “Constant Wonder“, out of Brigham Young University in Provo, Utah.  The subject was (naturally), cookbooks.  Host Rachel Sherman plied me with cookbook questions, most of which (I hope) I answered without sounding like a nerd.  You be the judge!

(Right click on the link below and select “open link in new tab”.  Click on tab “Episode – BYU Radio” to open the program and move to the 21:59 minute mark to start the interview.  Return to the tab “More Talk About Cookbooks” and return to the post to watch the slide show, while listening to me ramble on about cookbooks!)

http://byuradiostage.byu.edu/episode/d5c5d1e9-dc4b-4942-b850-aa9ee6e8ef04/constant-wonder-sue-jimenez-cookbook-collections

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Excuse Me, But There’s a Chihuahua in my Turkey !

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Music – “What’s Cooking” from What’s Cooking by The Wolfe Gang. Released: 2010

In honour of Thanksgiving later this week, I’m running this earlier 2014 post about the questions posed to the Butterball Turkey Hot Line over the years.  Read it and laugh (or weep!)

We’ve all heard experts, teachers and the like say “There’s no such thing as a dumb question”. I’ve said it myself, while teaching a course in Forensic Anthropology to non-science students. One evening, following a brief discussion of how to determine the sex of an individual from the bones of the skeleton, one of my students quipped “It’s easy. All you do is count the number of ribs. If it’s a man, he’ll be missing a rib as he had to give it up to God to create Eve”. Well, I really didn’t know how to respond.

In the world of food and cooking, I find it amusing and sometimes bewildering to read the questions folks write in to various sites for cooking advice. Butterball Turkey has had it’s share of doozies over the year, and other websites geared around cooking usually feature a “Q & A” section, which are tremendously enlightening.

Here is a sampling of some of the questions posed to various websites. I have taken the liberty of addressing the questions with my OWN responses:

Can you microwave a box of wine? (Probably not a good idea, but why would you want 5 litres of hot boxed wine?)

After eating rancid butter, what should one do? (Serve up some moldy bread to go with it?)

Just the thing to go with the rancid butter you ate (Photo Credit: http://www.huffington.post.ca)

Can you be harmed if you eat wax paper? (It depends. Is it a name brand wax paper or the cheap generic stuff?)

Check to see if your wax paper is name brand or generic before consuming. (Photo Credit: http://www.theartofdoingstuff.com)

How long does it take for a poison hemlock to kill a person? (Ask Socrates)

How old is the oldest Twinkie? (See photo below)

Apparently, “Twinkies” have been around since the Druids built Stonehenge. (Photo Credit: http://www.sodahead.com)

On Easter Sunday is Chuck E Cheese Open? (Is this a food question?)

Does fudge taste less good if it’s shaped like poop?
(This must be a question for the psychologists in the room)

A query to http://www.foodista.com asks which fudge you’d prefer. This one, or….. (Photo Credit: http://www.tampa.about.com)

….this one? (Photo Credit: http://www.elanaspantry.com)

 

 

 

 

 

 

Can you cook on both oven racks?
(Yes…even simultaneously!)

How do I unbake a cake?
(Don’t start in the first place)

“Marge, I think it’s too late to ask the Food Channel about how to unbake a cake” (Photo Credit: http://www.dmdehaven.wordpress.com)

And, the inevitable turkey questions that surface at Thanksgiving. The folks at the Butterball Turkey Hotline have heard them all, I‘m sure!:

Can I brine my turkey in the washing machine? (Only if you wash your clothes regularly at a Laundromat)

Can I take my frozen turkey into my sauna to thaw it faster? (How many people are in the sauna at the same time as the turkey?)

If it’s not brown enough, how long should I leave it in my tanning bed? (When it starts peeling, I’d take it out)

Is it OK to thaw my turkey in the bathtub while bathing my kids? (How dirty are your kids?)

If you’re going to use this method to defrost your turkey, don’t add kids and soap. (Photo Credit: http://www.twoguyseatlunch.blogspot.com)

What does ‘remove from heat’ mean? (Really?)

 

 

Can I use my oven’s self cleaning cycle to speed up the cooking process? (If you prefer incinerated turkey, why not?)

Cooking a turkey using your oven’s self-cleaning cycle is not recommended (Photo Credit: http://www.somethingnewfor dinner.com)

If I cut my turkey with a chainsaw will the oil affect the taste? (Only if you lick the chainsaw)

Can popcorn be popped in the turkey’s cavity during the roasting process? (Is this microwave popcorn or Jiffy Pop stovetop popcorn?)

Kids, don’t try this at home! (Photo Credit: http://www.eetimes.com)

How do I get the bleach I used off the bird? (Drop it in the tub when you’re bathing the kids)

How do I get my Chihuahua out of the turkey?
(Is this before or after roasting?)

“Don’t worry Pepe…I’ll try to get you out before she puts the turkey in the oven!” (Photo Credit: http://www.harry.enzoverder.be/cats)

My 5 pound turkey has been in the oven 24 hours. Do you think it’s done? (Probably. I suspect that anything that was hazardous to your health is long dead)

Can you thaw a turkey by wrapping it in an electric blanket? (Why not go the extra mile and just cook it in there too?)

The turkey in my freezer is 23 years old. Is it safe to eat? (It depends. How old are you?)

Can I baste my turkey with suntan lotion? (Are you cooking it in a solar oven??)

Here’s what happens it you put suntan lotion on your turkey (Photo Credit: http://www.crazyshenanigans.com)

How long does it take to thaw a fresh turkey? (Not long)

How do I prepare a turkey for vegetarians?
(Carve it in the shape of a cauliflower and stuff it with a lot of vegetables)

Proper vegetarian turkey (Photo Credit: http://www.blog.nativefoods.com)

How long does it take to cook a turkey if I leave the oven door open the whole time? (Are you trying to heat your apartment or cook a turkey?)

How long will it take to cook a frozen 34 pound turkey?
(How much vacation time to you have?)

Better ask your boss for extra time off at Thanksgiving to cook this bird! (Photo Credit: http://www.severedisability kid.blogspot.com)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The above questions were compiled from the following websites:

http://www.foodista.com
http://www.cracked.com
http://www.huffingtonpost.com
http://www.jezebel.com
http://www.cookingjunkies.com
http://www.snopes.com
http://www.bitsandpieces.us.com

(the tongue-in-cheek responses are my own!)

The Refrigerator as Repository of Rancid Remnants

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Music – “Livin’ In the Fridge” from Alapalooza by “Weird Al” Yankovic. Released: 1999

I recently heard that November 15th is “National Clean Out Your Refrigerator Day“.  Some references suggest that Whirlpool Home Appliances started the promotion, however, this has not been confirmed.  An alternate explanation is that someone (turkey breeders? pumpkin growers? cranberry harvesters?) suggested the date in anticipation of all of the room need to accommodate the coming Thanksgiving leftovers.  Who knows?

Don’t forget….November 15th!                           (Photo Credit: http://www.news8000.com)

I used to watch the show “Hoarders“and I was both fascinated and repelled by the stuff that people hoard and how MUCH of it.  Suffice it to say, while I have never been accused of hoarding cookbooks, some people seem to think that no matter how organized or how much care goes into the selection and curation of a large collection of books, ownership of more than 1,000 books is “hoarding”, or, at least the Compulsive Book Hoarders Group seems to think.  Wikipedia describes “bibliomania”, as the collecting of books which have no use to the collector nor any great intrinsic value to a genuine book collector.  Well, that certainly lets me off the hook, as my cookbooks have tremendous value and are frequently used. Whatever.

In appreciation of the upcoming “National Clean Out Your Refrigerator Day“, I pulled out several of my older “cookbooklets”, which were issued from refrigerator manufacturers back in the day:  Frigidaire, General Electric, Servel Electrolux, and International Harvester (I never knew they made refrigerators).  This is an example of what a well-maintained refrigerator should look like, according to Servel Electrolux:

The “Servel Electrolux” refrigerator from their brochure, dated 1936. Such slick lines! Such cleanliness!

 

 

 

 

Or, from the booklet that accompanied the General Electric Refrigerator, for the modern woman of 1927….

1927 – General Electric Refrigerator, all neat and organized inside. No rotting meat here!

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Frigidaire Model AP-7-2, which featured “…enduring Tu-Tone porcelain enamels of gray and white, in lustrous white Duco or in any of five harmonious color combinations of Duco”. Very impressive! From their 1928 “Frigidaire Recipes”.

One of the things that absolutely floored and disgusted me no end about many hoarders was the frequent obsession with retaining everything, including garbage, and even worse, rotting food.  For example…(a picture is worth a thousand words)…

Wow! (Photo Credit: http://www.kingofmaids.com)

 

 

 

 

 

 

…..OR……..

Whew! (Photo Credit: http://www.ebaumsworld.com)

 

When the HazMat team has to come and clean out your fridge, you know it’s serious! (Photo Credit: http://www.pinterest.com)

Shared office refrigerators have always had a bad reputation. (Photo Credit: http://www.mydoorsign.com)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TGIF at the office! (Photo Credit: http://www.amazon.com)

One wonders if hoarders actually attempt to eat the rotting remnants in their refrigerators or if there is just a sense of comfort knowing that the fridge is full….

Please tell me that people don’t actually try to eat any of this stuff! (Photo Credit: http://www.istock.com)

 

 

 

What might be lurking in this myriad of takeout containers and is new life being spawned?            (Photo Credit: http://www.atpeacewithpink.blogspot.com)

 

These ladies are carefully organizing the refrigerator to ensure freshness. No waste here! (Photo from “101 Refrigerator Helps, published by Frigidaire, 1944)

 

 

 

Roommates have their own refrigerator issues too…(Photo Credit: http://www.americannewsreport.com)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wouldn’t you rather eat food that came out of this deluxe Frigidaire? (Photo from Frigidaire Recipes, 1928)

While this might not be considered “hoarding” food, the owner had a novel approach to keeping fish fresh….

OK…who wants fresh sushi for dinner? (Photo Credit: http://www.lifehacks.host)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

How many hot dogs does it take, end to end, to circle the earth? (Photo Credit: http://www.forums.macresource.com)

If this is the kitchen, imagine what’s inside the refrigerator! (Photo Credit: http://www.drchristinavillareal.com)

Perhaps the safest kind of “hoard” in your refrigerator (never rots, doesn’t smell) (Photo Credit: http://www.vanpoolusa.com)

Don’t get me wrong.  I’ve located some relics at the rear of many a refrigerator of mine over the years….I recall one particular ghastly and stomach-wrenching episode some years back, which, without going into details, I named “the ugly egg salad incident”  (you can read between the lines)

So, please don’t forget that November 15th is NATIONAL CLEAN OUT YOUR REFRIGERATOR DAY!  You just never know what you might find….

No comment. (Photo Credit: http://www.smosh.com)

The Tortures and Trials of Tongue Twisting Translations

Music – “Fun Words from Foreign Languages” from Little Turtles by Davy Andrews. Released: 2012

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Some time ago, I wrote about the fascinating experience of attempting to translate several foreign-language cookbooks I have in my collection, using several online website translators.  The results, needless to say, were somewhat puzzling and others downright funny. (“Antipooches of heart of beast and of chicken” Huh?) (March 29, 2014)

A clear indication of what will be on your plate. (Photo Credit: http://www.dailymail.co.uk)

 

I was recently given a copy of “Gran Libro de la Cocina Chilena“, by a very good friend, whose wife was Chilean and passed away a few years ago.  In attempting to translate some of the recipes and instructions, I ventured, once again, into the nebulous world of translating from one language to another, in this case, Spanish to English.

Now, one might think that Spanish to English would be a pretty straight forward kind of exercise, not fraught with too many issues as it might be if you were trying to translate Kazakh to Afrikaans.

Wow. You can find anything at this restaurant, according to the translations! (Photo Credit: http://www.vaviper.blogspot.com)

 

 

 

I pulled out a few random samples, both in recipe titles and instructions, for your delight and amusement and subjected them to three different online translators.

Don’t bring your kids to this place, if the sign is correct! (Photo Credit: http://www.smosh.com)

 

 

 

 

 

 

For example, “Liebre al Champana” is variously translated as “Hare to the Champagne“, “Hare to the Champana“, and “Hare Al Champagne” (wasn’t Al Champagne a jazz musician in the 1940’s?)  The initial instructions indicate that the cook should ” limpie y lave muy bien la liebre. Trocela y envuelva cada presa con una tira de tocino“.  Thus, the cook should “Clean and wash very well the hare. Trocela and wrap every prey with a bacon strip“, or “Clean and wash very well the hare. Trocela and wrap every dam(prey) with a strip of bacon“.  Alternately, one could “Clean and wash the hare very well. Trocela and wrap each prey with a strip of bacon“.  Take your pick.

So many choices, it’s hard to pick. (Photo Credit: http://www.forums.animesuki.com)

 

Bring your mother-in-law for this one. (Photo Credit: http://www.indutch.com)

If you are fond of oysters, you might need to know that the recipe “Ostiones al Estragon” could be either “Large Oysters to the Tarragon“, or “Oysters at Havoc“, which sounds much more fascinating.  “Fritos de Arroz” seems pretty mundane, when translated into English:  “Rice Fried Food“, “Fried Food of Rice“, or “Fried Rice“.

It’s not clear if this is what the food is or what the outcome will be after you’ve eaten it. (Photo Credit: http://www.kenwoodtravel.co.uk)

I found that the translation for “Acelgas a la Diabla” was rather mysterious.  Depending on your preference, it could be translated as “Spinach Beets to the Whore“, “Spinach Beets to the Devil“, or “Chard with the Devil“.  I really have no idea what “Peritas Borrachas” is, but according to the translations, it could be “Drunk Experts“, “Expert Leather Wine-Bottles“, or “Adept Drunk“.  I prefer the latter translation as it is much more colourful.

This could be an adept drunk or a “Peritas Borrachas”. Is drinking, while riding a bull legal? (Photo Credit: http://www.app.com)

Fancy Goose with Orange?  “Ganso al Horno Con Naranja” gives you a few options.  You can take your “goose to the stove with orange“, or take your “goose to the oven with orange“, or have your goose baked with orange.  If you prefer duck, you might cook “Pato a la Gallega“, which translates as “Duck to the Galician” or “Galician Duck“.  I did learn that the Galicians are a “national, cultural and ethnic group whose historic homeland is Galicia, in the north-west of the Iberian Pensula” (www.wikipedia.org)

Chinese to English translations are so much fun! (Photo Credit: http://www.readersdigest.com)

 

 

 

 

Now, one of the more fascinating and difficult to understand translations was “Zorzales con Repollitos de Bruselas“, which turns out to be “Thrushes with Bruselas Rechicks“, “Thrushes with Rechicks of Bruselas“, or, more mundane:  “Thrushes with Brussels Sprouts“.  Likewise, I was unable to determine exactly what “Chupe de Guatitas” is (animal? vegetable? other?).  According to the translators, it is “Suck of Guatitas“, or “Guatitas Suck“.  Either one sounds slightly obscene.  From what I finally determined, “Guatitas” is tripe.  Like I said, still sounds obscene.

Another place to avoid taking the relatives. (Photo Credit: http://www.funmedianews.com)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lastly, I revisited a recipe I had previously found in a Spanish cookbook, “Anticuchos de Ternera“.  Pick your favourite:  “Veal Anticuchos“, “Veal Ant Pusses“, or “Antipooches of Veal“.  They are all so descriptive that my mouth is just watering to try it (whatever it is)

I’d go for the “chicken”. It’s cheaper than the “real chicken”. (Photo Credit: http://www.pinterest.com)

Whew! This is certainly good to know! (Photo Credit: http://www.imgur.com)

So, brighten up your day and have fun trying to translate foreign language recipes.  You might be surprised (pleasantly, I hope).

Sop, HIvje’ ‘ej Quch! 

(that’s Klingon for “Eat, drink and be merry!”, or at least that’s what the translation site said!)

It’s Almost Here – National Cookbook Month !

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Music – “Happy Cooking” from Happy Cooking by Eiji Kitamura. Released: 1986

                        For those not in the know, October features many “national” events,               according to popular lore:

National I’m Just Me Because Month
Adopt A Shelter Dog Month
AIDS Awareness Month (President Reagan)
American Cheese Month
Antidepressant Death Awareness Month
Bat Appreciation Month
Breast Cancer Awareness Month
(World) Blindness Awareness Month
Caffeine Addiction Recovery Month
Celebrating The Bilingual Child Month
Children’s Magazine Month
Christmas Seal Campaign
Church Library Month
Church Safety and Security Month
Class Reunion Month
Co-op Awareness Month
Cut Out Dissection Month
Down Syndrome Awareness Month
Dyslexia Awareness Month
Eat Better, Eat Together Month
Emotional Intelligence Awareness Month
Emotional Wellness Month
Employee Ownership Month
Energy Management is a Family Affair-Improve Your Home Month
Financial Planning Month
Feral Hog Month or Hog Out Month
German-American Heritage Month
Global Diversity Awareness Month
Go Hog Wild – Eat Country Ham
Halloween Safety Month
Head Start Awareness Month
Health Literacy Month
Home Eye Safety Month
Italian-American Heritage Month
International Augmentative & Alternative Communication (AAC) Awareness Month
International Starman Month
International Strategic Planning Month
International Walk To School Month
LGBT History Month
Long Term Care Planning Month
Month of Free Thought
National Animal Safety and Protection Month
National Apple Month
National Applejack Month
National Arts & Humanities Month
National Audiology Awareness Month
National Bake and Decorate Month
National Book Month
National Bullying Prevention Month
National Caramel Month
National Chili Month
National Chiropractic Month

National Cookbook Month

National Cookie Month
National Crime Prevention Month
National Critical Illness Awareness Month
National Cyber Security Awareness Month
National Dental Hygiene Month
National Dessert Month
National Disability Employment Awareness Month
National Depression Education & Awareness Month
National Domestic Violence Awareness Month
National Dropout Prevention Month
National Ergonomics Month
National Fair Trade Month
National Family Sexuality Education Month
National “Gain The Inside Advantage” Month
National Go On A Field Trip Month
National Kitchen & Bath Month
National Learning and Development Month
National Liver Awareness Month
National Medical Librarian Month
National Orthodontic Health Month
National Pasta Month
National Physical Therapy Month
National Pickled Peppers Month
National Pizza Month
National Popcorn Poppin’ Month
National Pork Month
National Pretzel Month
National Principals Month
National Protect Your Hearing Month
National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month
National Reading Group Month
National Roller Skating Month
National RSV Awareness Month
National Sarcastic Awareness Month
National Sausage Month
National Seafood Month
National Sensory Awareness Month
National Spina Bifida Awareness Month
National Stamp Collecting Month
National Sudden Cardiac Arrest Awareness Month – October
National Toilet Tank Repair Month
National Window Covering Safety Month
National Work and Family Month
National Sudden Infant Death Syndrome Awareness Month
Organize Your Medical Information Month
Pear and Pineapple Month
Photographer Appreciation Month
Polish American Heritage Month
Positive Attitude Month
Raptor Month
Rett Syndrome Awareness Month
Rhizomes and Persimmons Month
Rhubarb Month
Right Brainers Rule! Month
Self-Promotion Month
Spinach Lovers Month
Squirrel Awareness Month Link
Tackling Hunger Month
Talk About Prescriptions Month
Vegetarian Month
Wishbones for Pets Month
Workplace Politics Awareness Month
World Menopause Month

                              So, readers might assume that even though I’m a bit biased,                                my favourite October event is:

National Cookbook Month !

                                                       Pick one up and read it today!                                                                                             To borrow from the ad for the Capital One credit card,                              (“What’s in YOUR wallet?“)

                                                 What’s on YOUR cookbook shelf?

Cookbook collecting has even rubbed off on my cats! (Photo of Tux by Sue Jimenez)

Tux and Shadow picking a recipe for dinner (Photo by Sue Jimenez)

“Cooking with Poo” (Photo Credit: http://www.lolriot.com) (Not on my cookbook shelf, yet!)

I hope your cookbook shelf doesn’t look like this! (Photo Credit: http://www.bobvila.com)

“Alright. Time to browse “Joy of Cooking”. I wonder how this thing is CATegorized?” (Photo of Shadow by Sue Jimenez)

Why is it that the cookbook you want the most is always out of reach? (Photo Credit by the author of the author)

There’s a cookbook for everyone! “The Axis of Evil Cookbook” by Gill Partington